The words, “Can I ask you a personal question?” always give me a sense of foreboding.

Tonight was no exception. They were uttered by a waitress in the hotel restaurant - a cute, though slightly dumpy lass. She looked nervous, but not nervous enough for it to be anything that she was personally concerned in. I guardedly said, “Of course.”

My suspicions deepened when she said, “You might be offended.” Nothing good ever followed that, in my experience. Said I, “It takes a hell of a lot to offend me.” Which is quite true, it’s years since I gave a toss.

“Did you notice a tall man in here a while ago?”

Not very personal, thought I. “No, I can’t say I did. I’ve been in a world of my own…”

She looks more uncomfortable. Now, it’s probably dawned on you already what’s coming next. It was a mild surprise to me, though.

“Well,” she said, “are you straight?”

Second time that’s happened to me.

Several exes can testify that I’m as straight as a particularly straight thing. But, why is that not obvious to the casual observer? I don’t have enough fashion sense to be gay! The only time my wrist has ever been limp is when I’ve been under anaesthesia…

Now, I’m not a homophobe, although the idea does jar a little with my position as both a biologist and a Christian. I’m actually rather flattered, particularly as, from what I can tell the guy (deputy manager) is actually quite good-looking. The waitress seemed to think he’d be quite disappointed.

There was a part of me that wanted to double-check the lock on my door, though. Does that make me a bad person? :-s

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